also, stephenie meyer (and the twilight series) is the spawn of satan. actually no, not the spawn of satan. because if she was the spawn of satan it would imply that i hate her, and thus i must put effort into something and i'm (as previously stated) extremely lazy.
i just find it fucking ridiculous that girls my own age (and older) think that she, and the aforementioned book series, is some kind of literary genius. several reasons for my
1. purple prose
jesus christ this woman abuses the thesaraus to no end. reading the books made me feel slightly ill in the stomach due to some of meyer's ridiculous sentences. example:
He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt open over his sculpted, incandescent chest, his scintillating arms bare. His glistening, pale lavender lids were shut, though of course he didn’t sleep. A perfect statue, carved in some unknown stone, smooth like marble, glittering like crystal
do i really need to say anything else on this topic? i think not..
2. bella is the most pathetic excuse for a main protagonist and female ever
she represents everything that feminists have been fighting to demolish. she is meek and not terribly bright. she attaches herself to a male with absolutely no personality simply because he is some adonis-like figure and just so gorgeous and then when he leaves her in the seconds books she proceeds to falls to fall into a deep depression because she just can't bear to live without him. she is so dependent on him and it just reinforces the gender stereotypes that we are battling to destroy. she has no interests, no hobbies, outside of loving edward and she gives up her aspirations and plans for college to marry him. the saddest thing is that elizabeth bennet, one of the greatest feminist heroes of all time, and pride and prejudice are said to be stephenie meyer's inspiration for one of the books.
3. there is no plot or character development whatsoever
according to good ol' steph, you don't really need a climax, falling action or character development. all you need to do is focus on how perfect your male hero is and how they are sooo in love
4. their relationship is abusive
he watches her while she sleeps and removes the engine from her car to prevent her from seeing her friend, to which she responds with "he's just a little overprotective" and "he does it because he loves me". and then the sex scene in the 4th book. he is "so lost in his love for her" that he destroys a bed and she ends up covered in bruises, which she then proceeds to hide from him, so he doesn't feel guilty. holy fuck, i'm not going to say anything else.
wait i am
number 5. stephenie meyer is a mormon
hahahahah just kidding...not really
so many more reasons i can't be bothered to type.
rant over.
p.s.
AHHH! devil woman! devil woman! (sorry i couldn't resist)
3 comments:
oh goodness i almost cried with happiness after i read this
its good to know someone else feels the same way about s.meyer and her horrible books!
How frustrating/annoying is she!
I want to cut off her neck and spit in the hole.
No not really of course....um
hahaha i feel the same way
and everyone is counting down to the next twilight movie
it hurts my heart..
Post a Comment